Its sucks sitting here feeling like this. I hate this feeling yet time and again i find myself going through it. Am in the most pain i have ever known, alone, wishing that he or my family was near so that i could have someone to tell me that it will be well. Maybe rub my back, pass the hot water bottle or just hold me. Some days like today i hate being a woman. I cant eat, drink and missed work on days when i have important meetings and need to prove myself. Am tired of this whole thing yet in another few weeks i will be right here again, in pain, alone, in tears and wishing that it was different. There has to be another way really, there must be.
I really can't call my mum because she will only worry and i don't want to be a bother to anyone. Here's to me being strong, somehow have to make it to work tomorrow missed enough already. Still, i wish i wasn't alone just for tonight. Chin up, I will get though this!