Going Down!

Yesterday,
All my troubles seemed so far away,
Now it looks as though they're here to stay,
Oh, I believe in yesterday.

Suddenly,
I'm not half the man I used to be,
There's a shadow hanging over me,
Oh, yesterday came suddenly.


I am not sure what i feel, sometimes am sad,then am angry then helpless but mostly overwhelmed. I have had this feelings for the past week or so and from the look of things i had better figure something out real quick. Stuff normally doesn't get me to tears as easily as it is doing now. I feel like i have a million thoughts going through my mind coupled with an endless fast growing to-do list. Towards the end of last week, i was sure that if i could get away if only for a while then maybe i could devise a plan. Now whenever i sleep i keep waking up with fright and have strange incoherent dreams. Then they started a fight where my family is at, its hard to talk to my daddy who is down playing it(i know he is protecting me)and then get the real deal from my siblings. Arrggghhh am so fed up. Still its not been all cloudy, i must thank all the amazing people who have asked about me and my fam (Akiey '07). Others who have made me smile and forget if only for a moment. Yeah even you too who didn't know what to say, am grateful maybe when i can i will talk to someone. I feel like am going down but at least am looking up.

What I want of you

From epoems.org

I want an infusion of your knowledge
I want to converse with you from moon to moon
I want to know what your desires are
I want to understand your listening
I want to eat your calmness
I want to hum in the key of your music
I want to feel the folds of your clothing

I want to know how things are joined together for you and how set apart
I want to taste the inside of your shell
I want to see how Fibonacci works for you

I want to hold with tenderness your secret tragedies
I want to make you realise what you didn’t know you knew
I want to move you to tears
I want you to be glad of the tears I move you to
I want you to give me the courage to be unreasonable

Chagua Amani(Choose Peace)

Approx. 300 people killed, 250,000 people without homes, there couldnt be a better time to say Chagua Amani Zuia Noma. True to Eric Wainaina's Kenya Only this is my home, after all is said and done we have to make it work. God bless and help us all. May peace prevail.