7 October 2005

Will You?

What is a marriage proposal? For me this is the proposition from either of the partners to the other mostly done by the man asking for the consent to partner for life. In my thinking, this is the result of a satisfying relationship for both culminating in changing the status to a more permanent one. How did this come up you wonder?
Case Study One
After DK(not the kikuyu musician) been away for a while traveling on business he comes back to town and as is habit calls me up for a drink so that we can catch up. We have no romantic linking and inklings. He suggests we go to Visions Plaza for nyama at the Maasai meat market. We get there and are sitting at the roof great view if i say so myself.The place is fairly packed, couples mostly. There is a band playing some really good music. We place our orders and get our drinks as we wait for the food. In the meantime we catch up on his travels and I tell of what mischief I have been up to. This guy is one of my boys we can talk about anything we discuss a few chicks as they pass and comment on some guys whom I think are cute. After we eat, as we are just chilling, the DJ announces that there is a guy with a special message for his gal. So I turn to him and the conversation is something like this
Me: *laughing*mjinga mwingine amepatikana some fool is about to propose *turning to look around*
*he laughs*
So I turn to look who that is then when am turning to tell him that the guy got cold feet coz it aint happening I see a brother on one knee. Some lady shouts say yes come on do it say yes and am thinking yes to what. Instantly I freak out, I see lips moving but I can’t hear jack the only thing that I can think of is how can you do this to me? the one thing that goes on and on in my head. Next thing I feel hot on my face, am pissed like hell. Grab my handbag , down the stairs into a cab and off home straight to bed. talk of runaway bride and fear of commitment.
Case Study 2 and 3
In this case both are working out of kenya.Long story short proposed on phone, still no romantic inklings. They are just my friends.

Now I wonder maybe I should be happy but am not. Iam a bit flattered though. I have had proposals before by a couple of people to have babies with them, reason being that they think that am a good person and would make a great mother boo hoo. For me not possible, see I want to get married and have children with a man I love, my best friend someone who I want forever with. I wonder if they understand the seriousness of marriage, that it is forever and that it takes hardwork you work at it everyday.Sadly i dont think of either of the in that way, maybe i have given them the wrong impressions or led them on without my knowledge. Anyway at 23 soon to be 24 (on the 23rd of this month *hint hint*) am too young and marriage is the last thing on my mind right now. I know that there are women who would kill just to have one proposal but I shouldn’t just consent so as not to hurt other peoples feelings.
I don’t know what to feel and think.I am told that when it is right I will know. My resolution is to give myself space and hangout with the boys less maybe make some female friends while am at it.as for you Cupid go aim somewhere else.


  1. Hold up I'm reading my girl am reading and I'll get with you our own other way this weekend sawa?

  2. Kwanza I'm very jealous coz u went to Visions Place-Msa Rd w/out me :( mmhh mmh the meat, woi at least am masai.

    Anywho, he proposed to you? ehhehhehheh, tht was unexpected yani, how many proposals have u had 3?4? wow!

    I also feel marriage is very important just as its meant to be serious and forever. Before someone proposes its suppossed to have you know? woi I dont know how to say it am so bad when it comes to anything love-related.

    But,I love hanging with the boys too and leave it at that. Talk of trying to make girlfriends, thank God for the 2 I have. Good luck in finding some.

    Live your life, true I also hear when its real and right you always know so good not to say yes just to please and mess later u know?

    Thanks for sharing, have a great wknd :)
    keep blessed!

  3. How could I forget to say happy birthday in advance to you lovely girlie?

    Happy b/day jolly good fella!

    p.s donn hate me for mini-comments, awwww too much love, feel it?

  4. An advbance Happy Birthday..Ati u r a run away bride pole gal on the experience of unexpected shock.... woooi..

    Actually marriage is a commitment not a skit and people should evaluate evrything before they now come with the ring and tell one Will You.....
    This is sooo nice....

  5. Why not share your secret with the other gals!I know some gals who are dying to be married!Anyway I do not know you personally so i would be curious to know what it is about you that would make a jamaa propose at the drop of a hat.What makes things worse is that you were not even dating!Talk about jumping into the deep end with dry feet!

  6. Woishe DK left there to face the crowd...

    Wonder what DK stood for Down (on) Knees,
    Dint Know (when)???

    Ati you hitched skirt, bebad viatus and hoofed it out of there like Catherine Ndereba? LOLOLOLOL

    Anyway, I think we guys need to learn lessons hard and know how to read the mood... Like Aco said, asking for marriage even before you've fikad holding hands stage is asking for trouble!!!

    Marriage requires forethought and commitment period!!

    Happy Birthday Gish in advance...

    *poi is masa??*

  7. "Wee umeiba jina yangu...ama wewe ni rong rost simbring"

  8. -did u atleast finish the meat...auuui...u left a dude kneeling
    -remember in runaway bride thaht shady joke ati "the pitter patter of lil feet will be hers as she runs from the alter" LOL

    i thinkn there is a lot of pressure to get married. just take it slow and dont let especially relatives influense you. when the time kija's it will comme heck it will be u on that knee taking ur chance as the real DK plays one man guitar...

  9. Happy birthday gisgungwa in advance; I shall be back on the material day to wish you gray hair *smile*
    That was a close shave, I mean even I was scared for you. A proposal out of the blue. Whatever it is they say is true, when the time is right your heart of hearts will tell you so. Just a question this DK has he ever hinted on the direction of his thoughts?

  10. 1) Happy (what's the opposite of belated? Insert here) Birthday.

    2) DK ... Chief, back to that drawing board! Ati with a DJ at a nyama joint?!!!

  11. First the daram that is not in my life heh! And my bday is on 23rd but thank you will fedex cake to y'all and tell you what trouble i get into.
    girl, u know i got only love for you ebu you get at me that way.let me know when you are comingi will peleka you there despite the memories hope no one else tries to propose there again. If only he had hinted what he was up to u know would have made things a whole load easier.thank you for the birthday in advance will fedex the cake.
    people ougth to take proposals as serious as marriage coz its not funny when you are the stranded one and end up looking like the bad one coz people dont jua that theres nothing going on.
    i wish i knew the secret too maybe i could turn it off or bottle it up and make millions. will let you know and you help with the patent si ndio...
    kwanza LMAO alafu DK is an alias. Ati Catherine NDereba ha ha ha acutally faster than that only down the stairs. before proposing just give it time whats with the rush
    could it bee that we are? welcome to the family.
    i dont mind going down on one knee with migiithi as a soundtrack just as long as its with the guy i want forever with.trust me anm taking it slow. and yes i had shibad i was well fed something i said thank you for later.
    he has never jst kaboom anbd he's on his knees wewe it must have been one of my most frightening of experiences plus the crowd didn't help either.thank you for the wishes.
    the place is really romantic the setting was ok plus you get a view of the whole of nairobi at night just super lost points on the proposal.shoulda given me a warning.

  12. So, have you spoken to DK since then? Hmm, I wonder what my reaction would be. I know someone who got caught up in the moment of this grand proposal..only to turn the guy down later-

  13. i have he says he isin town again so i gues swe will have time to sit and talk things would hate tolose him as a friend. I just couldn't wait and do it later just froze and did the first thing that came to mind.

  14. true, marriage is a big deal. I've been pressured a few times but I decided I'll do it when I'm ready. Pole, I hope you remain friends.