8 December 2005

Just Let Me


I have been thinking of you, the times we spent together, habits formed. I still find myself waiting for that call or SMS good morning,how u doing,goodnight, i love you.How we shared each moment and event.I recall the fights, then from breakups to makeups.My love, my story, each chapter co-authored side by side, the good the bad and the ugly.My heart , why do you weep so?
Tis true that weeping soothes the soul; but i dont want to be soothed all i want is my love my friend back, take things back to the way we used to be. Please dont say you are sorry.
Let me grow numb with the pain of reality .
Let me mourn for the loss of a part of me.
Let me question and doubt if i will ever find another like you.
Let me rethink of every action and word uttered, should i have done it differently?
Let mine eyes refuse to shut and thoughts of you haunt me by day and night.
Let my shattered heart console herself.
Let food nor drink touch these lips.
Let me be sad, hide from the light of day.
Let me curse cupid and place all blame on him.
Let me wonder how i didn't see this coming.
Let me be till i can find the pieces of this shattered heart.
Let me cry till there are no more tears.
Let me have my ice cream, my chocolate,my vodka, my comfort foods.
Let me have my love stories to watch and inspire more tears.
Let the sight of couples holding hands in town being tears to my eyes.
Let me be alone, wallowing in a sea of pity.
Let me question what he/she has better than i.
Let me ask without answers, why me?
Let my dream of us , two children,X5 and mansion in kitisuru shatter
Let me be sulky,moody,bitchy,irritant,let me be i deserve to be
Let me swear to never again fall this hard
Let me have all those questions for which i have no answers and explanation
Let me tell my story over and over again though i just finished telling it
Let me have no words suffice to tell the loss, the pain and hurt inside...
When all is said and done...
Let me rise again strong, scarred and dare to love and trust again, ever so deeply and selflessly with the hope that this time we live happily ever after.

8 comments:

  1. first here

    Yaay

    Deep stuff Gish, deep stuff!!!

    What does kill you, makes you stronger!

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  2. @ Milo
    You still alive?!
    @ Gish
    It is always good to look within!

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  3. You pain and hurt is so vivid. Please don't punish yourself though. I'm sure you dear one is looking down on you from heaven and cry and live hurt and feeling lost is the last thing he wants you to succumb to.

    Look within you and bring forth what's best for you only now and always. Live on today like your life just began. Sorrow is in the night but joy comes in the morning. I read somewhere that even behind the blackest cloud is a blue one.

    Chin-up, smile and God bless in all you do.

    Happy Week :)

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  4. "Let me question and doubt if i will ever find another like you."

    I don't know what to say. Most of the time, saying "I know how you feel" is arrogant and presumptuous. Assuming you understand another's pain.

    But since I am going thro the same pain, let me be presumptuous. I know how you feel. I don't know if those dreams will ever go away, if the pain will ever cease.

    But just like you say, you will rise again, scarred but stronger and so much more beautiful for the pain!

    Live strong.

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  5. Impressive skills. At this rate we shall replace the Rubadiri's & Soyinka's fairly comfortably. Duly Noted.

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  6. you could be living my life, only you said it in better words than i, my exact sentiments.
    "Let me question and doubt if i will ever find another like you."
    i am still looking, and i have not found another. or maybe i just don't want to find another. thanks for saying it out. well said.

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  7. Beautiful. I hope it helped to say out loud. This is probably of no cosolation but time heals all wounds.

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