23 May 2006

Going Home

Going home for me has always been something i want to do more yet i cant seem to. I live away from my folks all alone in this big bad city while my family lives out of town in Naivasha(silence, clear view of stars and clean air). Thing is this, i end going home after my ma has called to ask what happened to her daughter or after daddy calls to say he is missing me and can i come home? Mostly this trips are split-second decisons where my bags are packed or sometimes not and am off next minute, am knocking at my mom's. I have no idea why i call home my mom's i hardly say am going home i always say am off to ma's.
So in another one of those flashes i packed up on sartuday and was off home. Its only an hour and half to my mom's and after blacking out in the matatu i woke up just in time to say "shukisha hapo kwa bumps" (loosely translated i alight after the bumps).
So i walk in and the door is open so as i walk in my nieces peep and suddenly the "auntie auntie" chants are on. Hugs here and there mostly here and shortly am served with tea (insert KETEPA advert here) talk of great home coming. In comes my nephews as usual auntie umeleta nini(auntie what have you brought)bunch of golddiggers. We sit to talk to my sister who is visiting with my folks, you know the usual how is so and so and the other... Much later my mom pops in , my fave seat is sorta hidden and you have to be all in before you realize that there is someone seating there. More hugs and how have you beens?.Now to my mother i always lose weight, look tired, not eating enough among others. I wonder whether a day is coming when i will have taken care of myself well and added weight etc at this rate never since the same applies to my sisters who are married and away by now.
So jib jib jib then much later my dad, same story different cast. Here we talk soccer( boohoo) he teases me about arsenal losing, worldcup, work, life in general and yeah when am i bringing my friends home(read boyfi) which is loudly echoed by ma who reminds me that so and so's daufghter who got married now has a baby boy(good for her, who cares. After watching the Bold and the Beautiful, Yes, you read right my folks follow ir religiously guess it would happen to anyone who is retired and all ti hi hi with ma telling the story so far filled with he opinion and occasiona expression of disgust at Brook Logan or the other.Ma thinks stephany Forrester is just the bomb ati she fights for her family. We end up talking till late with conversation ranging from family to relatives and everything in between.
Sunday morning, is it just me or have telepreachers increased by a hundred fold i mean any channel you flip there is some preacherman casting demons away, promising hell and brimstone so i choose to sit outside and bask something i never have time for as i sip on my tea and maandazi(not mahamri i know).
Sooner than later we prepare to go to church. My mom still critizes what am wearing at the moment lose the sweater but am cold but nooo lose it so as usual i say yes but dont lose it.This is a big deal for me because i was brought up in this church from back in sunday school days to youth over holiday(what went wrong) plus almost everyone saw me grow up and call most of them by auntie now that they are my mom's girls clique.
Now these are presbyterians, the music is hymnal and then choruses men, the kikuyu songs that eveyone else know except me but i can dance so i proceed with the later.Did i say i chocked on the believer's Creed and had to read it out, but it was in kiswahili (imani ya mitume). Then the children, youth, women's guild then the men's fellowship sing LOL at my dad singing. Now, the sermon is in kyuk you know the full hell and brimstones, couldn't be scarier, then the hugs again now from my million aunties with the same story of you have lost weight and why dont you come home more oft, my mom chirping in the back i have been telling her the same thing... Few daring ones ask when am bring that man home, i smile and say soon... which seems satisfactory for the time being.
Off to sunday lunch which is unspokenly by-law Pilau, more bonding over repeat program of Wrestling RAW is WAR he he he. Around 4pm i figure i must get back so i have to find a way to carry all the goodies(read vegetables and fruits endless)that are meant to fatten me up before the next visit. So after my mom's prayer's for a safe journey and all which i must admit always leave me teary eyed.
Back to my house, alone again...hmmph cant wait to be home again.
do you remember this:-
Christ is the head of this house,
the unseen guest at every meal
the silent visitor to every conversation


  1. Very nice reminisce. My problem is that I can’t stand some of my up-country relatives. Our society as been too fractured by infighting and resentment – so rare trips upcountry and painful and expensive

  2. That doesnt feel like Gish.The only part i can elewa is "blacking out at in the mat"

    Feels nice.Be good and grow fat

  3. Mommy's gurrl. That's you. I can see your man (Daktari?) is going to have a tough time with in-laws.

    Envision the scenario - you get home and Mummy says: "Gishungwa, you are not eating!! They are working you too hard... you look tired..."

    Daktari hears: "Wewe!! WHAT are you doing to my baby, my gishungwa?? You are mistreating my daughter I can see that!"

    Mummy says: "Here is some nduma, do you want warus? And these greens are fresh off the shamba."

    Daktari hears: "You are not paying for her upkeep. I have to supplement!"

    You better clue Daktari in on Mummy's language very early. Before you take him home. So that he can tune his receiver to shortwave instead of the city FM and he does not get the wrong message.

  4. Hi Gish - your upcountry trip is so reminiscent of mine. How many times do I get to hear mum ask: when are you coming home - even after I have been back here for two weeks:LOL I got tired of asking who is paying my fare.
    My dad always claims I am skinnier, my cucu says I get lighter skinned (which is true, winters are a melanin hazard, I tell ya)but even coming from here, I always waltz in (unannounced) like I was just in last weekend. My parents already gave up and dont even ask what are you doing here? anymore.

    And like you, when I go to shags (Kiambu) I say I am going to 'my parents house' - somehow I dont see it as my home anymore.. although I will never let anyone treat me like a visitor. Once I get in, first stop point: Kitchen, then go to say hello to the cows while the dog is tugging at my clothes and the cat giving me the dirty look.. LOL

    And like Bankelele - there are relas that are just... relas. Better not seen nor heard.

    And LOL we had one of these:

    Christ is the head of this house,
    the unseen guest at every meal
    the silent visitor to every conversation

  5. Awwwww, aki, I need to visit my folks.

    LOOL, your life sounds a lot like mine, aki, kwanja kanisa and stuff, and gashai, and 'youth'...aiii, now what are those? mbele me I potelead those people, so now you become "the ones who moved to Nairobi"...aiish!

    We SO HAD Christ is the head of this house!!! It was maroon. Awwwwwww!, i wonder where it went...sigh.

    Me, my mum, loves to overfeed me because
    "you are so thin. Is work stress?"
    "Finish your dinner"!!

    Quite odd, because when my mum was my age, she was smaller than me!!! (can you imagine how teeny that is!! Aiiii).

    Anyway, so gald to hear you had such a cool weeekend galie...

  6. Gish, why are you impersonating me haki? Tihih

    I KNOWWWWWWW. When my mummy prays, aki I always get a big lump in my throat you know......and I wish I could stay there coz Nai is a bitch...LOOOOOOL, tihihi

    Women's guild? Uh ohhh! Kwanja mathe was/is in one of those...vile they vaaa those blue vitambaas, me I told mathe, aiii, dont follow me when you aer vaaring that thing, tihihi...

    The only song I jua is "nitugukugoca Jesu gaturume ka ngai, thakame yaku anga ndu ana ndu..." Ma they sing it every time those people.....

    Aki now, I a sooo nostalgic, I think I will spend half of my leave with my folks.

    Such a wunnerful post!!

    *sniff sniff*

  7. LOL@KM - thakame yaku anga ndu anga ndu - that's the funniest shit i have read all day!
    And yes, Mum praying for me before I leave always makes me want to stay... and then she stays awake the whole night until I am back here and I call to say I am home..LOL that is Loooooooooooooooonnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnng *sniff sniff*.

    I always make a point of saying I will go to church when I am in kenya, especially the one where I grew up - you know, sunday school, Catechist(sp) Catholic, mahoyas, etc - I miss that - but my lazy behind never gets round to it!

    This is so bad Gish - why now, how, now (KM, '06)

  8. @banks
    this was to my mom's though my relatives we are pretty closeknit even though we have our share of drama.
    LOL at blcking out, that is daddy's girl Gish.am really trying to add weight but nada.
    love that conversation. He is already well aware of it all plus the nosy aunties who want to meet him. i think he will survive, heknow his stuff. thanks for passing by.
    I agree, relas well... Like you am never a visitor at home i still do things as if i live there. strange how some rules still apply even though am how old.
    we also had one of those too you and it was maroon plus a million family pics almost like a family album on the wall. LOL at fattenign up i think its just a mother thing trying to fatten you up not sure for what.thanks had a really good one. and church he! ebu we dont go there...
    @Guess and KM
    i know those tukutendereza songs that never end and the outrageous vitambaas ti hi hi. Why is like that i think moms have a special reserved channel to God and the way they pray for good things and all. G, imagine even my ma cant sleep until i call to say iam home. moms are just the bomb.To me my home church symbolizes innocence that i once had.

  9. LMAO @ tukutendereza....LoooooooooooooL, he! and the hugs they patiana?

  10. Kumbe all paros are the same talk of you cutting weight and determining your dressing as you head kanisa.. And the vitunguu and veges LOL...

  11. Ah you gotta love family moments like that!Well in my case I cant coz last Christmas was the last time our whole family was together.Add to this we dont get along with the extended family.So dont take it foregranted!
    The long ride and the song and dance you get may seem like a hassle but they are worth it!
    I rememeber we had that poem hanging on our wall back home!
    Nice weekend!