Sighs

Kenyan food * now am hungry *

Nairobi in the Morning


Aside: Pics of the Stanchart marathon coming up

Guilty

Nyabos and Ssebos (Ladies and Gentlemen) of the jury. The defendant Gish and other persons not before the court have pleaded guilty of having extreme fun last week Thursday till Tuesday this week. The scene of the crime is Pearl beach gardens, Ssese Islands, Lake Victoria, Uganda, see http://www.pearlgardensbeach.com. Gish is guilty of the following among other crimes in no specific order:-
 Being drunk in the bus on triple distilled blue moon Vodka, so that I have no recollection of the journey between Nakuru and the outskirts of Kampala
 Hangover and feeling like death thereafter paying 200 Ushs to puke in a loo got better after katoko (a million bananas and two pieces of meat) and plenty of water.
 Loitering aimlessly in Shop Rite in Kampala looking for something to kill the hangover then being unable to tell how much I owe them. Aside: a roll of tissue was ushs.950, water 1.5 liters was 650, 100gms (couldn’t buy individual pieces) of gum was Ushs.2600 and others.
 Sleeping in the taxi as they call matatus all the way to Entebbe.
 Getting into someone’s house and eating katoko for a fee of 1000ushs.
 Heckling, being restless, brew sampling and after a while settling for Nile Special beer all there in the ferry.
 Choosing to sleep alone with intentions, no it didn’t happen.
 Going for a walk on the beach and watching the sunset over Lake Victoria.
 Dancing and singing around the bonfire every night.
 Inciting and participating in Skinny Dippers Anonymous, blame it on the alcohol read as waragi, vodka among others
 Participating in the local councils clean up exercise whilst under influence, walking in the rain and being the official supplier of prophylactics.
 Being buried in the sand alive and E, I owe you one for giving me a d*k. explains the sand in my hair.
 Wearing scandalous clothes, aiding and abetting truth or dare contest, strip poker and “I have never…”
 Realization that am not all that insane after all.
 Lovely pleasure of being hosted by two wonderful men who spoilt us and showed us around and made them breakfast.
 Went to Good Fellas bar, the Tavern, wandegeya, ate Porko(read pork), rolex(sorta burrito like thingy)
 Went to Angenoir after a death ride from some guy who wanted to show off his Jeep to the girls
 I learnt what it means to say” thambiria gathugumi”
 At mid-night on Sunday, had my bathday with assorted fluids then proceeding to the ladies to dry using the hand drier.
 Harboring homicidal thoughts coz of the stupid DJ who kept on singing along.
 Making out in the bus, excuse, we were in the damn bus for 19 hours due to an accident, yeah we hit a drunk guy on a bike.
 Peeing in the bush due to excess fluid consumption.
 Making friends.
 Dancing till I couldn’t dance anymore.
? Boat riding with unknown fishermen on patrol.

Dear Jury, both sides recommend that she be sent back to the scene of the crime to think about her crime. What say you?

This weekend....

Whaat?

Okk. Maybe am *insert appropriate word here* but help me comprehend what response does one expects when you do either of the following???

Action:
Am walking towards you or have already gone past you and the best thing you can do to get my attention is "Psssst", "Madam unakaa poa( madam you looking good)", "Whistle, make the kissing sound" or any other "bright" idea that comes into your head you nutter!
My Reaction:
I wonder if your head is screwed on right, even better am i supposed to do catwheels and trip falling over myself just because you noticed me ahhhhh... That would explain my clueless face and if you are really lucky *rolling eyes +shaking head*. oh by the way Do i look concerned just because you are fly, think you are, your mother said you are or any other dumb thing you may have heard. Oh that goes for you too Mr.I-have-money+Big-flashy-car! Whatever happened to Hi my name is X.

Action:
So i agreed to come on a date with you once or twice heck x times where for x=infinity. You have always said and treated me as a friend then your friends come trotting and you introduce me gayly(no pun intended)as your "mama".Mama here being your new catch.Did i miss the writing in the sky?
My reaction:
Hi am Gish and no am not his mama. no debate and no smiles and yes twas nice knowing you.

Action:
When you offer to "take care of me", by putting a standing order for a few staggering Kshs to my account....
My reaction:
Are you drunk or just plain stupid. First i hate men who think that just coz they have few shillings to offer they can get anyone they want so from this Gish you can stuff it up u know where. FYI, i take care of my self and i need taking care of i would call my daddy, yeah bite me.

Action:
Location anywhere, you tap my ass....
My reaction:
I think you dont need your front teeth. I can guarantee you a slap that is without doubt, see that provokes my instant anger, just add water and stir. I cant fight but will see to it that one of us leave.

Wuuuussaaaah!

In a different light

Got this link from Akiey. Let me know what you think of it
http://allafrica.com/stories/200610100537.html

AFLEWO, Pink Ribbon

Mostly out of curiosity, last Friday evening found Gish on a long queue at Kencom waiting to board a bus to NPC Karen. Time check 8pm yeah or a function that was meant to start at 9pm yap that’s Gish for you and countless others. I was going for AFLEWO which is Africa Lets Worship. I must admit though that this was based mainly on curiosity than anything else. Since she doth enjoy a night out as much as the next person she decided to go for an all night service so as to draw the difference between both sides i.e. the light and the dark. Question, whatever happened to courtesy, mean we are all queuing to go to CHURCH, shouldn’t you feel guilty or pretend to be for jumping the queue and then bringing a whole crowd with you. Being a churchly atmosphere, she bites her tongue, mental reminder to say a prayer for them… ahem. After what seemed like forever, here comes the bus and she sits next to the driver, hoping to get there ahead of all the others. Whilst in the bus it seemed that the driver had every intention of getting us across the bridge rather than the church. This did in fact spark a conversation between yours truly and her seatmate about the drive, the joys of Christianity among others.
So she gets to the venue, its packed to the brim so she saunters in the aisle in search of seating space and finally manages to wriggle in. The evening was beyond my expectations, the music was ubber heavenly, and the people were just the ones, the lighting and atmosphere electric. Then came the time to pray for all nations, the flags were there to symbolize such. The leader lead “Nkosi sikeleli africa” with the words projected for those who didn’t know the song, now that had me teary eyed as they sang it in Swahili then my countries anthem, now tears were falling down my cheeks. I sort of felt what athletes feel on the podium whilst their motherlands anthem is played. As we sang I thought of what a privilege it is to be Kenyan. Even Mutua’s “Najivunia kuwa mkenya” wouldn’t suffice. See the thing about this pride is not in the riches and accomplishments but in the small things that we take for granted. I thought of the peace, the love for another despite our differences, the freedom to worship whatever it is that you think is deity, the freedom to criticize, the beauty and wealth of this country, small liberties that mean the world to other countries. The pastors went ahead to name and pray for all the countries from Cairo to Cape Town. I ever have been so proud to be Kenyan as I was then still is. We were there till 6am, and then went home to shower and change ready for work next day. I must admit that my feet hurt since I was standing most of the night but the feeling inside was worth every single bit. see http://www.aflewo.com
Last week I did a post about Free Breast Cancer Clinic sponsored by Safaricom, so I trudged there on Saturday, got myself tweaked and pronounced of good health. It was quite funny though not in a ha ha way. I would reccomend that you do get checked, it is very crucial for all both male anf female to have this done.
I am reading Donahue my own story by Phil Donahue & Co, very interesting.
Good Week to all.