2 November 2006

Ah! Men



12 Types of men

1. MR. THUG LIFE
Advantages
a. Real good at making love
b. Fun and exciting
c. Makes you laugh
d. Has your back, will fight and protect you
e. Stands for what he believes in
Disadvantages
a. Usually drinks and smokes too much
b. Always got drama
c. Stays a thug forever
d. In and out of jail

2. MR. NAW, I DON'T HAVE A GIRL
Advantages
a. Will take you out in the beginning
b. Will introduce you to all his friends
c. Compliments you all the time
Disadvantages
a. Has a girlfriend who he's been with since the 2nd grade
b. Will not get rid of her
c. He tells you about her after you've fallen in love with his *bleep*

3. MR. BIG BALLA
Advantages
a. Will give you money with no questions asked
b. Has alot of style to him
c. Will show you some of the nice things in life
Disadvantages
a. Never returns your pages
b. Feels he can come to your house at any given time without calling first
c. Loves to be around his boys more than you.

4. MR. IM IN THE INDUSTRY
Advantages
a. Can get you and your friends on the guest list at all the jumpin parties
b. Can have a decent stimulating conversation
c. Tends to dress nice
Disadvantages
a. You don't know if he's gay, straight or bi
b. Seems flighty when you speak of a solid commitment
c. You still have to wait in line to get in all the jumpin' parties,
then there's drama at the door
d. All he has is a bunch of pictures with celebrities but he doesn't
know any of them personally

5. MR. INTELLECTUAL
Advantages
a. Book smart
b. Cares about how you feel
c. Has a very good job
Disadvantages
a. Boring as hell
b. Doesn't know what the hell he's doing in bed
c. He is not street smart
d. Always asking you when he can see you again

6. MR. GHETTO
Advantages
a. THE BOMB IN BED!!!!!
b. Makes you laugh
c. Got mad style and flava
d. Has a temper, but generally a charming sweet guy
e. Says he want a real relationship
Disadvantages
a. He got 3 or more baby mommies
b. Wants to lay up in your crib, use the phone, and eat up all the food
c. Is in denial when you tell him about himself
d. Comes home at 3:00 am and says he was out with his boys

7. MR. IM A RIGHTEOUS BLACK MAN
Advantages
a. Will teach you about black history
b. Revolutionary
c. Inspiring & gives to you spiritually & emotionally
d. Wants a wife and family
Disadvantages
a. Breaks up with you for a white girl
b. Mo money-doesn't have a job
c. Doesn't own a nice suit, always wearing camouflage and oils
d. In the end, you find out he is just a trifling, con motha*bleep*a
Chris!

8. MR. TOO DAMN GOOD
Advantages
a. Will introduce you to his mother
b. Has a job and will take you out
c. Will give you money for your bills if you need it
d. Sometimes he goes to church on Sunday
Disadvantages
a. Sometimes he goes to church on Sunday
b. Secretly wants to be Mr. Thug Life
c. Wears fake Movado & Rolex watches when he goes to the club
d. Ignores you when the game is on because he takes sports too
serious -He didn't make it professionally
e. You find out after you break up with him that he was cheating on you

9. MR. PLAYA
Advantages
a. Will tell you the truth - that you're not the only one
b. Sometimes hes fairly decent in bed
c. He tells you that you've changed him and he's ready to settle down
d. Has his own apartment and car (invites you to move in with him)
Disadvantages
a. He doesn't acknowledge you in public, especially if there's a women around
b. Generally he is a punk (won't stand up for anything)
c. He expects you to believe all his lies just because he told you the
truth about other women
d. After you catch his lying *bleep*, he tells you that he told
you that he was a playa in the beginning anyway

10. MR. I HAVE A JOB
Advantages
a. Of course.... he has a job
b. Doesnt have too many bad habits
c. Will take care of you when youre sick
d. Tells you that he is in love with you
Disadvantages
a. You stay in the relationship 2 years or more and then find out
he's a shiftless, lazy son-of-a-*bleep* who wants you to do
all the wifely duties but wont give you a ring
b. He ends up telling you that he loves you, but is not "in love" with you
c. After he leaves you he gets married a month later

11. MR. BEST FRIEND
Advantages
a. He's your best friend, you tell each other everything; you
get along very, very well
b. He gives you advice when you and your man are having problems
c. The ultimate gentleman
d. Sweet and caring with a good sense of humor
Disadvantages
a. You end up hooking up with him only to find he ain't about *bleep* either!
b. Now, you gotta find a new best friend because you can't stand
his *bleep* no more

Drum roll...

******** 12. MR. RIGHT**********
Advantages
a..He loves God and takes his relationship with God seriously
b. He is intellectual, brilliant, and capable of taking you
there mentally and emotionally
c. He will love you even when you are not lovable
d. He has a career and not a job!
e. He acknowledges his faults and strives to be a better man
f. He understands a relationship is built on a 200%
quota - 100% him and 100% you
g. He doesn't have a bunch of kids and babies mommas - he's smarter than that
h. He is a true best friend and everything you ever wanted in a man
i. He was cute when you met him. But, after spending sometime
you see he's fine as hell! YAY YAY
j. He can dress - knows the difference b/t formal, semi-formal,
professional, business casual, casual, and since we are just
chilling let me throw on some sweats and a fitted hat
h. He loves his mother and respects women
Disadvantages
a. You've never met him and if you did he already has a girl/wife
b. Resides in your dreams.

They all sound a tad bit too farmiliar for my comfort, then again what do i know am a certified commitment phobe LOL. Seriously now which are you( if male) and which one do you want (if female)?

20 comments:

  1. Itsa good thing no Kenyan man fits into those categories.

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  2. am mr. right --> mr. right now

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  3. I started getting, er, agitated after comparing my type (which will remain unnamed) with Mr Right. Then I saw "Resides in your dreams". Phew!

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  4. I dont fit in any of those just like most Kenyan men!Keyword being most!

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  5. Hmm, the one i have a crush on right now is somewhere between mr Ghetto and Mr Right..but i generally prefer Mr Intellectuals, with geeks theres nothing you cant teach them *teehee*

    Lol @ Udi

    Great post.

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  6. Mr. Best Friend...been there done that...wusaaaaaaaaaah...think i'd much rather stick with Mr.Thug Life since Mr. right is in the wrong planet

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  7. @Udi
    they are not a perfect fit but they come close esp the wannabes. Sadly the wannabes take the cake.
    @MWangi
    LOL i hear you. thanks for passing by.
    @Erick
    theres no need to compare.If anyone wont take you as you are then hard luck their loss.
    @comment deleted
    LOL
    @Aco
    No debate there and i think its a good thing that you dont fit.
    @D_shy
    All the best am yet to figure out which is which.
    @Quint
    Mr best friend is ok unless with intentions. Am looking yet i know mr. right yeah figment of my imagination
    @aegues
    Pluto is far will you pick me up or lets meet in Sartunr. somehow that dont sound right.

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  8. Very Funny but Mr. Right has to be the bomb at sex tooooo!!! and he has to be a feminist!

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  9. Hehehe...they all do sound a little too familiar. There is no such thing as Mr. Right (too bad for us females, and good for you dudes). My Steve would have fit the description, but damn! He has a kid...lol

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  10. hehehe nice post, and still men remain a mystery to me!

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  11. Damn! What if you fit in more than one of these categories?

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  12. Show me 10 men who fit the ideal character and i'll do anything for you.

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  13. Gish - I will join your commitment phobe club now. Dealng with the various types of men is too frustrating and complex.

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  14. greatings!
    The answer to your question is I am *her* Mr. Right. I'm not even going to waste your time with B.S. because I give HER all the credit. My bad boy days are a decade behind me so that was a start, but she inspires me to greatness and that begins INSIDE our relationship and spills over into other aspects of my life. But enough about me. I just want to talk about my Miss Right. I'm the luckiest man alive.

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  15. I wish I could say mr right, but unfortunately that would be lying. I don't fall in any particular category but have something in common with most types. Adds to the complexity of the species...

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  16. Mr 13, ok 14, now that modo has thugged THAT spot, it would have been so apt. 14 shd be Mr Kenyan man... I can even start off

    1.Will always be in the bar with his boys, ogling butts, and sometimes, YOUR butt...LOL...

    :-)

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  17. Yeah Mr.Right only in my dreams, an he's safely tacked there, never 2 c da light!
    U are Right, I dated a Mr.Intellectual an he was damn boring!
    Nice post..

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  18. Like I sed all Mister rights were burnt at the stake after the Beijin conference....enjoy the Mr. MessdupS you've got..

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  19. @goodersgirl
    I agree. Me thinks that no wonder this mr. right-guy is in my dreams only.
    @sisbigbones
    Guess you just cant have your cake and eat it huh!
    @chatterly
    my dear when you figure them out please let me know. men cant do with them cant do without them lol
    @Ruben & mwasjd
    would that make you a hybrid, hmm i wonder...
    @pesa tu
    i cant even come up with one and am ok with that.
    @mighty Afro
    i think this is a good place to take a rest as we decide where next. too much variety huh!
    @Xavier
    well said. Since we are allso different hence each of us has their version of rightness. so off ot find my "mr.right" which means that i have to be his right one.
    thanks i hear you.
    @modo
    iit has been known to happen that for some 13 is lucky so dont give up just yet
    @jade
    no14 lol, we have met before
    @Klara
    welcome. Mr. right shright bah! intellectual i like to challenge me shoudl coem with a sense of humor though
    @bantutu
    i want my mister right dont want any others mister right even if mine is messed he is my right.

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